I can't sleep again...a lot of things on my mind, things that I have to unload somehow or else I'll probably suffer more sleepless nights after this one. So here goes:
1. I really want to have better grades this semester and I know that God wants me to pursue a PhD afterwards but I'm just so fucking scared about it that I'm jeopardizing my chance. Dear Lord, please give me the courage to face the destiny that you have planned for me. I lean on you now for the wisdom to get me through my exams and please continue to bless me in all my endeavors.
2. Something I'm trying to figure out...I'm not beautiful, I'm not sexy, I'm not rich or famous...heck, I'm not even that smart, and consequently, as you've guessed by now, I don't have a lot of self-confidence, I think this is the reason why I end up being too friendly or too comfortable with the opposite sex. In my mind, I believe that they couldn't really get anything from me...I mean, why would they take advantage or be interested (other than as a friend) in someone like me? But then, I don't know what happened but things started to change...somehow I don't feel "safe" around my male friends anymore. Should I be blaming the stupid Friends with Benefit movie for this problem?
3. Why is it that I always end up liking a guy that I know could never like me back (in the way that I want him to)? He's smart, funny, really nice...but he's way older and way up there, I don't think he'll ever spare me a glance. Hopeless...
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